I am going to ask you to please be especially aware during this government temper tantrum. Be aware there are people who are panicking about how to pay the mortgage or face foreclosure. Families stressing over how to pay for the necessities like food or medications. Some are looking for part-time employment, just to get by, but are being told no because no one knows when they’ll be called back to their “regular” job.

     Local food banks are being stretched to the limit. Everyone donates during the holidays but the current need has just skyrocketed. Food banks are running at a deficit. No one should have to go hungry in this country, for any reason. What’s happening is shameful. Shameful is a word we don’t hear much anymore.  Shame is: the painful feeling arising from the consciousness of something dishonorable, improper, ridiculous, etc., done by oneself or another. There are a lot of “others” behaving shamefully these days. 

     It’s always good to remember, when you point a finger of blame at another, there are at least three fingers pointing back at you. Blame has always seemed like a waste of time. To me, it’s just a way to procrastinate instead of doing something to try to fix the problem. Donate to a food bank or organize a food drive at your church or school. There isn’t a lot you can do to pay a mortgage but helping with food will free up a diminishing budget in favor of the mortgage or medications.

     If you are looking for people in government to understand, I wonder why. Persons who run for office by definition are helped by already being wealthy. To mount a campaign, you need to have money. Some politicians are probably able to remember where they came from and what it was like to wonder where the next meal was coming from or how to pay the house or rent payment each month. Many others can’t relate because they, fortunately, have never had to worry about those things.

     Keep this in mind. Politicians work for YOU, not the other way around. You are the boss. They don’t work for the president even though they seem to pander to the him, daily. I’ve given up wondering why they gather at his feet, rubber stamping all his idiotic ideas while the country, our country, loses standing in the world. While foreign powers manipulate our elections. While children die and are molested during immoral family separations. While regulations meant to be beneficial for ALL citizens get repealed and water quality goes down, air quality goes down, mentally unstable persons  purchase weapons to carry out their despicable acts. But on the bright side, the top 1 or 2 percent get richer and richer. Yay!

     I don’t listen only to the liberal, right-wing press. I’m absolutely not brain-washed and find I’d be rather insulted if you assessed me that way. I just watch and read what is said Vs. what is denied or restated later. I know a lie when I see or hear one. I can understand an insulting remark when I hear it. I know bullying from an immature coward. I know insensitivity, misogyny, megalomania, insecurity and sociopathy when I see it day in and day out.

     We have a responsibility as human beings to care for one another. If your neighbor’s house was on fire, you would help in whatever way you could. You would offer shelter or food. We all donate to Go Fund Me causes, run for donations to raise money to combat disease, buy raffle tickets to support hospitals and schools. Just because this current disaster is government-made doesn’t negate the genuine need of our fellow human beings. Help in whatever way you can. Don’t leave it to the politicians who just don’t seem to understand.

     Are you supportive or do you criticize? Think about the answer. We all like to think  we support our families and friends. I know this is something I struggle with because my knee-jerk reaction leans toward negativity. Unfortunately, sometimes I open my mouth before I take the time to consider all the angles. The consequences of that usually embarrasses the hell out of me. I at least try to see things from the other person’s viewpoint, even if retrospectively.

     I recently gave someone important in my life a gift. It wasn’t expensive, wasn’t extraordinary, just something I thought they might like and have fun with. I couldn’t wait to see if they liked my gift  🎁 and wasn’t disappointed. They loved it! The sad part is that when my friend told another friend about the gift, their comment was (or words to this effect) “Is it really good enough?” In one fell swoop there was criticism and lack of support for the giver and receiver. I suddenly felt the gift was a mistake. I know, what someone else thinks shouldn’t matter and if I was a perfect person, it wouldn’t have. However for a couple of days, I’m ashamed to say, it did bother me.

     Why do we feel the the need to be critical? Why do we withhold support? It always helps me to try to see things from the other person’s point of view. Could my friend’s friend just have said something like, “how cool or that’s nice”? No matter what they thought about the gift, that gift wasn’t going to impact their life in any way. Most likely, they would never even see it so why did they feel an obligation to judge it? I used to make a lot of my clothes in the 70s and 80s and I think I got pretty good at it. I remember making a dress from a complicated pattern. It turned out pretty well and I was proud of my achievement. The first time I wore it to work a co-worker, who also sewed many of her own clothes, told me it was cute then went on to say, “It must have been an easy pattern because you couldn’t possible have made it otherwise”. Ouch! 😣 I continued to sew but a little chunk of the confidence in my sewing skills was destroyed. 

     We all have experienced incidents like this. I’ve certainly had my share of discouraging remarks come my way. So, I ask again, why do we feel the need to criticize? If someone comes to you in the blush of a new relationship, why the need to point out all the reasons why it won’t work? If you have an idea for a business, for redecorating your home, a new haircut, a beard or mustache or a new job, why does the person you share this news with feel the need to be that negative voice? There are always reasons not to do something and believe me, when you embark on any new endeavor the biggest negative voice is usually your own. We don’t need another one pointing out what we already have rolling around in our brain.

      If you ask for advice or an opinion, then the presumption is you are ready for whatever response comes your way. My husband dislikes unsolicited advice. I understand that; I guess I do too. I usually only seek an opinion from someone I trust. That person is Not a negative person but one who will give me an honest assessment, good or bad. However, we all have people in our lives who give their negative view whether solicited or not. In keeping with my resolve to try to see both sides, maybe naysayers are trying to save you from disappointment or failure. While that is really nice, we learn more from our failures. We learn to pick ourselves up, dust off, re-evaluate, reorganize. Then we begin again.

     I think social media only adds to emboldening people to be negative. How many times a day are you asked to Like 👍 or Unlike 👎 something, presumably anonymously? After all, if you are anonymous there are no consequences to your vote, right? But if you apply that paradigm to everyday life, there are consequences. Words hurt! Negative opinions belittle and demean. Naysayers don’t seem to believe those to whom they give their (negative) advice are capable of handling their own lives. They need someone else to “fix” it. That seems pretty ambitious to me, and tiring. 😴 Isn’t it tough enough to manage your own life without having to manage someone else’s life too? Maybe we should all just mind our own Beeswax, don’t ya think?

     I was raised with “If you can’t say anything nice, don’t say anything at all.” Where did that go? If you can’t resist saying something, how about making the comment more positive. When my friend told their friend about my Christmas gift, instead of asking if it was good enough, why not say something about it being a thoughtful or fun gift? Everyone is entitled to their opinion, about everything. Just use your inner-censor before you express it. Maybe the problem is we don’t exercise our inner-censor enough and it’s become sedentary. It just becomes easier and easier not to think before we open our mouths. Stop it! Thinking first is important. Words hurt, words can permanently scar. Words can have a long term effect. We all need to be kinder. What the world needs now is love… so spread some love the next time someone tells you something that would normally engender a negative response from you. You’ll find it is just as easy to be  kind.

     My husband gave me an attachment for my KitchenAid stand mixer that not only sifts but then adds the dry ingredients to wet ones. If you bake, if you have a KitchenAid stand mixer, you should have this attachment. It fits any KitchenAid mixer, even if it’s 50 years old or 15 years old or if you got it last week. It not only sifts but it weighs the dry ingredients, as well. (I don’t know why you need to weigh the dry ingredients). The groovy part is that it sifts the dry ingredients together. As they sift, they are released down this little chute into the bowl holding the wet ingredients. No flour flying all over the counter as you try to spoon-add the flour to the wet stuff. Sifting makes whatever you bake, fluffier. It has renewed my love of baking. I baked six loaves of bread (5 egg nog/cranberry loaves and 1 gingerbread loaf) over the holiday. So much easier with the attachment. Tomorrow I think I’m going to make sugar cookies 😋 Yum!

     Segue to the rolling pins I found on Pinterest/Etsy. They are embossed so when you roll out the cookie dough, it imprints the pattern on the dough. The finished cookies look very Scandinavian or Old World-ishy. Anyway, there are many patterns to choose from; reindeer, Christmas trees, snowflakes and florals. Some pins have different holiday images; some have other random themes. The cookies are really lovely and, I think, eliminate the need for further decoration. The rolling pins are handmade. So worth having and something to pass down in your family.

     On to Bed, Bath and Beyond… or not. I found a great gadget for keeping plastic bags closed. Bags like bread bags, hot dog and hamburger bun bags are hard to keep closed with those little twist tie things. We were in BB&B looking for something I found online that was supposed to be in stock at the store near where we live. Wasn’t in the store but, as the clerks alway tell you when you can’t find something you saw online, “We can have it shipped to the store in a couple of days” necessitating Another trip to the store. You don’t have to buy it but you do use more gas and time out of your day to make the return trip. Just a friendly warning ⚠️, BB&B seldom has what is shown online in the store. I’m just sayin’! Anyway, I spotted this gadget while I was looking for the other thing. It’s a small, short tube deal that has buttons on both ends. When you compress the buttons a circular space opens in the middle where you insert the neck of the plastic bag and when you release the ends, the middle section closes around plastic holding it tightly closed thus keeping the bread item fresher. It’s a super gadget, not expensive but one of those things that once you have it you wonder why you didn’t know about it sooner.

     My husband and I have discovered essential oil diffusers. My only regret is that we didn’t try them earlier. The diffusers run about $50 or less. We got ours on Amazon. They add humidity to the air and when you add essential fragrance oils, they diffuse wonderful scents too. It’s much better than scented candles (less dangerous, as well). The floral oils can make the house smell like spring or a summer garden. The autumn oils, like cedar or pine or maple sugar, take you on a walk through a colorful forest in October. Winter oils bring to mind a cold day or a cozy evening around the Christmas tree and fireplace. Some oils will convince you a bakery opened next door and the bakers are just taking a batch of cookies out of the oven (vanilla, brown sugar and apple). You are the chemist and can mix any number of scents to create any mood. You’re only limited by your  imagination. We have one in the bedroom and, I’m convinced, it helps us sleep better. Some nights I put lavender, eucalyptus and rosemary together which is so calming. The diffuser adds moisture to the air and in this dry climate, it’s essential to a good night’s sleep. The essential oils provide peaceful ambiance.

     We got an Insta Pot last year when they were the New Best Thing! Of course there’s a NEW model now that crisps the skin on chicken, supposedly. I think it’s just a way to sell more pots. We’re still learning how to use it. It does save time and is very easy to clean up. Doesn’t heat up the whole house. My husband made a wonderful Italian Chili in about half the time. We’re going to make Beef Bourguignon for our anniversary dinner. I’ll let you know how it turns out 😋. I’m looking forward to it. Don’t think you need to buy a new model every year, however.

     Saran Wrap has a new wrap, Press and Seal. It is so much better than regular Saran Wrap. No clump of clear plastic wrap that is thrown away because it got stuck to itself and can’t be separated. The new Press and Seal is translucent instead of transparent. It sticks to any container and to itself but doesn’t become a mess of clear plastic goo. Give it a try, I like it much more than the old kind.

      To clean hard water build up on a shower door use Epsom salts (1 cup), baking soda (1/2 cup) and liquid dishwasher soap (1/4 cup). Make a paste, rub on the shower door and rinse with clear water. Will remove the build up, best solution to this problem ever discovered. Hard water stains don’t come off with most cleaners on the market. I tried everything and this really is the only thing that works for me.

     The best cooking show on Food Network, “Diners, Drive-Ins and Dives with Guy Fieri. My husband and I watch it all the time and can’t make it through one show without our mouths watering. Guy goes to various diners, drive-ins and dives around the country to showcase places owned by local people. It is kinda hard to explain. It could be a New York style Deli in Texas or southern barbecue in New England. The show is always fun, surprising and, most of all, makes you eager to support the local restaurants in your area. Guy has been to Colorado a few times. He’s given us a couple of suggestions on where to go for lunch. We’re watching now, I’m drooling 🤤!

     Finally, if you have pets, you need to know about chewy.com. This is simply the best company for pets. Here are a couple of personal examples why I love Chewy so much. I ordered a dog feeder that was up off the floor since it’s easier for dogs to eat that way, easier on their digestion. When I got it, I realized it was much smaller than I thought. I contacted Customer Service at Chewy to find out how to send it back. They refunded my money and told me to just donate the feeder I got to a local rescue or shelter. What?!?  I also ordered a bed that was great but it had a zipper our puppy found immediately. I had to sew it closed so she didn’t chew and ruin it. I contacted Chewy again just to let them know maybe they should tell the people who make the bed to redesign it with another way to close it without using a zipper. Chewy refunded my money even though I didn’t request it. That’s a business model all companies should follow. Great prices on everything.  We save $25 on Auto-delivery dog food over buying from the big box pet stores locally. Food comes right to the house, what more can you ask for? From Customer Service to auto-delivery to toys, this company is just the best. P. S. Shipping is free on orders over $50.

     That’s all for now. See you in 2019. Wow, never thought I’d live this long, yikes. Have a Happy New Year. Be safe, be healthy and make at least one significant happy memory every month. 

     “It is more blessed to give than receive” (Acts 20:35)

     Those who give (either materially or of themselves) gain more more than they give. I truly believe this. There was a story recently on CBS Sunday Morning about giving selflessly. Steve Hartman, a regular contributor to the show, does human-interest type stories. Some are quirky and funny, others touch your heart. I often find myself tearing up. This week his story centered around this gentleman who, every Christmas, anonymously passes out $100 bills to random strangers. The people are in need and this “Secret Santa” money makes a big difference in their lives. This year “Santa” enlisted the help of a homeless man. The homeless man’s mission was to pass out 3,000 Secret Santa dollars to needy people he met or who he knew could use the money. This man stood on the sidewalk with his sign asking for “donations” to see who or if anyone would respond with kindness. Many just passed him by. Then two young women stopped and spoke to him wishing him a “Merry Christmas”. Each were rewarded with $100 bill. One of the young women wept. Clearly it made a difference in her circumstances. Another guy dropped all the change he had in the man’s cup as he hurried past. He received a $100. Even though he had small children and little money to get them Christmas presents, he gave this homeless man all the pocket money he had. As he held back tears, he talked about what the money would mean to his family’s Christmas. Then there was the single mother of five, homeless, who wordlessly wept while the man praised her for the good job she was doing taking care of her children. No judgement, just encouragement and $500 to help give her kids a great Christmas. But the best thing was the man who was tasked with passing out the money learned how wonderful it is to give and help others who are in circumstances similar to his own. At the end of the story he said the whole experience changed his life. The Secret Santa gave this homeless man money for his help but it was changing other people’s lives that made the biggest impression on him.

     In my life I’ve known those who believe a gift, any gift,  must be expensive to have worth. That could mean many different things. Relieving your guilt because you’ve neglected the recipient, fixing forgotten birthdays or other special occasions, trying to ensure you will still be liked by the recipient. There’s a reason for the saying, “It’s the thought that counts.” There’s nothing wrong with a big, extravagant gift. If the gift comes from your heart, if you’ve thought it through, can afford it and know it will be received with the joy with which it’s given, do it. If it’s given only to impress or to make You feel better or absolve your guilty conscience it won’t be worth it. Resentment may be the end result; resentment from spending money you didn’t really have or feeling you are being paid-off to stay silent so the neglect can continue.

     Giving the gift you know someone would like or need will mean so much more. Even if the gift is a pair of warm socks. If the person getting those socks really needs warm socks they’ll be so glad you recognized their need and filled that need. You can make something; whether knitted, crocheted, painted, homemade or home-grown, you know the recipient will love and use it, so do it. It shows you put thought and effort into your gift. It shows you care about the person who is receiving that gift. The feeling you get will be just wonderful, trust me. I’ve always loved giving more than receiving. Well, at least since I stopped being a kid. Honestly, it’s much more fun for me to see the reactions to what I give. I love to make gifts. Sometimes they work out, sometimes not but it’s all right. I made the effort, put the time and thought into it. To me, something homemade means more than anything I might receive from Jared.

     So this year, instead of worrying more about how much you spend, spend from your heart. Give to someone who has less. Realize there are children who won’t have as much to eat while school is closed for the holiday since they usually get breakfast and lunch at school. Realize there are military families who may be separated during the holiday. Keep in mind there are pet rescues that do their good work through donations. They can always use food and supplies. Food bank needs never end. Any one working a service based job can use an extra buck or two when you tip. It’s hard work, mostly thank-less. They have families, bills, financial worries just like you. Think what a little extra money means to you. The feeling you get from giving will warm your heart for a long time. And maybe, just maybe your giving will be contagious. If we all start giving from the heart we may change the world.

     Yesterday was not a great day. It wasn’t horrible or tragic but disheartening. I went down to the laundry room in the basement, put in my load of clothes, turned the washer on and realized the sewer must have backed up. Must have flooded after I did a load of clothes the day before. (When the ground freezes it sometimes causes the sewer line to clog between the house and the street when it’s cold.) Our home was built in 1972. The city decided to plant trees in front of every house in the subdivision for beautification purposes. Unfortunately the roots have caused problems all over the neighborhood as they invade the old pipes. Since they are city trees, we can not, under any circumstance, touch those trees. We can’t prune or remove them. So we have to get the drain snaked once a year but this year we waited too long, the cold weather came early.  Anyway, while I was cleaning up the mess after the plumber left, I did what I always do when housework is tedious, I meditate–sort of. It’s probably more accurate to say my mind wanders. I’ve convinced myself “meditation” makes the work go faster and it is imperative when cleaning up sewerage overflow to go as fast as possible.

     So there I was, pants rolled up, latex gloves pulled up as far as they could go, armed only with one very small jug that needed refilling over and over and over again. I tried to flush leftover gunk down the floor drain. This was after I picked up the other grosser gunk by hand. 🤢 Needless to say, my mind wandered. (I just wish my nose could have had somewhere else to be.) I was stressed because I had a lot to do; finish the laundry, vacuum, decorate for the holiday and breakfast  for me (which I never had). I was thinking about the Christmas decorations and which ones I might use this year. I decided against using the quarter moon Santa head.  We used it last year and I decided to change it up. As I continued  flushing, I remembered how we got the Santa moon.

     Almost every year we go to a Christmas store called St. Nick’s, appropriately. It’s open year ‘round. If you need Christmas decorations at any time; any size tree,  any type ornament, stockings, hats, tree skirts, or more lighting options than you could ever imagine this should be your one stop shop. 

     About ten years ago, we took our yearly trip to the store. It’s a trip because it is on the other side of town and takes about 50 minutes to get there from our house. We usually make a day of it, lunch included. This particular trip the Santa pictured was on display in the lighting department. One look and I really, really loved this Santa light. It’s pretty big, a little short of three feet from pom-pom to beard tip. I knew just how we could use it. My husband, Mo, asked if they had another one. He was told that was it. Mo then asked if they’d sell that one, as is. Again, the answer was no. I was so disappointed and Mo was disappointed for me. My husband, being the incredibly friendly guy he is, struck up a conversation with the clerk as we paid for our purchases. They talked about Christmas and how in sixth grade he, Mo, memorized “The Night Before Christmas” just because he really liked the poem. The clerk asked if he still remembered it. (You have to understand this was, what, forty + years later?!) He then presented this challenge to Mo; if he could still recited the poem, he’d sell us that Santa moon at a 25% discount. So in the middle of the store’s lighting department, with maybe fifty customers looking on, my husband recited “T’was the night before Christmas, and all through the house, not a creature was stirring, not even a mouse.” People stopped what they were doing to watch and listen and smile. When he finished, with nary one mistake, a round of spontaneous applause and laughter broke out.

     The clerk kept his promise, the Santa moon head came down off display.  Then to smiles and pats on the back and calls of congratulations, the Santa moon head was packed up and sent home with us. I was so proud and a little amazed. I memorized the poem as well but couldn’t remember most of it. That he would do that so I wouldn’t be disappointed showed me how much he loves me and I love him right back for this and so many other wonderful things. I will never let this Santa go and maybe I should reconsider my decision to keep it in the box this year❣️What do you think?

 

     Whoa, whoa, whoa! I need some help. I need for someone, anyone, to explain to me what has happened to Christmas OUTDOOR decorating. Massive light displays I understand. I’ve been known to go a little overboard (more on that later). I understand, sort of, mixing religious icons with the Jolly Old Elf. I actually saw a Nativity scene And a Menorah And an inflatable Santa Claus on someone’s lawn once. Guess they were trying to cover all the bases.

     So here we are, about two-thirds of the way through Cyber-Monday and our neighborhood is already resplendent with Christmas lights and front lawn inflatable decorations. Those inflatable figures have certainly been the rage for awhile now. In the beginning there may have been Santa Claus or Rudolph or a snowman bobbing in the winter breezes, sometimes straining their tether-ropes when the breezes ramped up to brisk wind status. Who hasn’t rushed to dig out an inflatable Santa buried by an intense overnight snowfall? Speed becoming the essence as Mr. Claus was struggling to re-inflate. Not freeing him from his frozen prison could cause motor burnout.🌬🎅🏽 Ugh!

     For several years, Santa or Rudolph were pretty standard. Then a few lime-green Grinches surfaced. I could see that, made sense. After all, how he stole Christmas is a television staple during the holidays. The innocuous snowman was replaced with Frosty. Again, it seemed like a logical progression since the song is beloved by everyone. Now just sticking a Santa hat on any pop culture icon (particularly if it comes from an Arctic climate) makes it acceptable to display at Christmas but penguins and moose? When did, or better yet, where do penguins and moose represent even the 13th day of Christmas?

     Disney knew a good thing when they saw it (translation $$$$$). Soon there were Mr. and Mrs. Mickey and Minnie Claus complete with, you guessed it, Santa hats. Then Eeyore, Piglet and Tigger came on the scene with Winnie the Pooh, Santa hats on every head. Jack Skeffington, Oogie Boogie and that whole crew following closely after the movie hit the screens. Nothing screams Christmas more than skeletal figures in black and white, makes the red hat really Pop! I believe there is probably a Christmas inflatable for every Disney Christmas cartoon and movie ever made.

     I get e-ads daily for Christmas inflatables. There are inflatables that are over 12’ – 15’ tall: Christmas trees, Santas, Frostys, Grinches, stockings, elves and reindeer. I understand that, I do. We’ve had several inflatables, been known to blow-up a Santa, a couple of snowmen and a cute sitting Golden Retriever puppy in a Santa hat we got the year our Golden puppy arrived. What I’m  struggling with, struggling to understanding are the Minions, raccoons, Snoopy driving a zamboni, meerkats, Darth Vader, Hello Kitty, Batman, Spider-Man, pink pigs, squirrels and Santa riding an elephant. I know some are probably from television shows, but Charlie Brown, Lucy and Snoopy in a manger? Santa herding llamas? Really?

     One year my husband and I went kind of nuts decorating. Our decorations outside caused our granddaughter to make the comment that our house looked like a gingerbread house. We bought striped red/green paper lanterns, wrapped them in cellophane so they looked like peppermint candies and hung them from the eaves with lights in between. We had three Christmas trees that lit up in sequence to music, an inflatable snowman and Santa, lights that marked the pathway to the front door; one set in the shape of candy canes, the other set over-sized Christmas tree bulbs. It was fun, it was magical, and even though almost 2 feet of snowed covered everything, it was worth the effort to put it together. Our granddaughter loved it so much she remarked on the way  home she wished the night was just starting instead of ending. Magical memories for us all.

     Perhaps that’s the only explanation needed. These weird inflatables may seem to have absolutely nothing to do with Christmas but may have everything to do with the families who put them in front of their homes. They may be part of a favorite bedtime story or a much loved cartoon character or a remembered tradition from the past. Maybe they are reminders of other holidays with family and friends who, for whatever reason, can’t be part of your celebrations. I’ll really try to look at them with a different eye from now on. But I still have to draw the line at a poop emoji wearing a Santa hat.  💩

     

 

     I heard the news yesterday that George H. W. Bush had died. It saddened me. I believe he was terribly lonely without his beloved Barbara. The requisite remembrances are on every newscast. With each segment I watch honoring the former President, I find tears sliding down my cheeks. I had the same feelings watching the funeral of Barbara only a few short months ago. She had a beautiful, meaningful service, the centerpiece being her enduring love for her husband and their family.

     I didn’t exercise my right to vote for years after the Nixon presidency. Being young and naive, I felt personally betrayed by all the scandal, though I’m not sure I understood it at the time. Nixon was my first Presidential election. Growing up in a republican household, (I even belonged to Young Republicans in high school) I couldn’t wait to vote. So as Nixon sat in front of the television audience and admitted guilt by resigning, I felt so duped I vowed to never vote again.

     Fast forward fourteen years and George H.W. Bush was the presidential candidate. I decided it was important to vote again because I liked him, liked what he said, liked what kind of person he appeared to be. I cast my ballot, George H.W. won, I felt good about the political process again. I really can’t tell you what happened politically during the next four years but nothing impacted me personally so it was easy to vote to return Mr. Bush to office. He was running against Bill Clinton and lost because of the adamant promise not to raise taxes, a promise he wasn’t able to keep. Under Clinton, the economy improved and so did my circumstances. I made the decision to vote for his return for a second four years.

     I grew up politically a lot during the next four years. I realized I wasn’t as aligned with republican ideologies as I thought. Nor was I completely aligned with democratic ones. I was and am, a combination of both although I suppose I lean a little more left. I believe we should help each other, are responsible to try and improve our world in whatever way we can. I was proud when we elected Barack Obama because I felt as if we were actually growing as a society. We were finally moving beyond our country’s past of bigotry and racism. While I’m not naive enough to have believed everything would change overnight, it felt like a long-overdue beginning. Much the same as electing a woman would be a start toward real gender equality.

     In eulogizing President Bush, they detail how kind, fair and honorable he was. How committed he was to a life of service to this country. He was a gentle man and a gentleman. As President he knew how important it was to keep his temper and behave appropriately as the chief representative of this country. Barbara and he were good parents and grandparents. They set a great example for public service. The love they shared was deep and abiding and there for everyone to see. I like to believe they are together again sharing that deep love and devotion.

     My tears aren’t for President Bush. He had a life very well lived. My tears are for me and for our country because I miss seeing a husband and wife who are devoted to each other and this country. I would rather have a president who is restrained, compassionate, sympathetic, mature and, most of all, decent. I believe words leave indelible scars, disrespect is infectious not easily forgotten even if forgiven. This country and it’s people are important, their lives are important, their living conditions are important. We the people deserve to be represented by a gentleman or gentlewoman, a gentle person.

     I want to talk about buttons. Not the kind that keep your coat closed on a blustery, cold day. Not the kind that hold up your pants, or keep your breast-pocket secure. Ah, I’m really not sure why there needs to be a button on a breast-pocket on a shirt or jacket anyway. I mean what are you keeping in a breast-pocket that requires that level of security? Oops, now I’ve probably tapped into someone’s button. They LOVE that extraneous breast-pocket with the exceptionally useful button security. Sorry 😬!

     For my purposes here, buttons will be defined as those incidences when you get irritated or annoyed by something that happens. It could be something small or meaningless to others but to you it’s like a switch gets flipped. I’ve heard people say “they see red” or “felt their face get hot”. I just fume and sometimes may, may, use words not heard in polite society. So periodically in my blog, I’m going to discuss my buttons, if for no other reason than to take away some of their power.

     Button No. 1: Television shows or movies, and especially television commercials, that show pets eating foods that aren’t good for them. Let me give you an example. Picture a lovely family eating dessert. The dessert is a luscious three-layer chocolate fudge cake for octogenarian grandma’s birthday. Spot, the family dog, is included in the celebration as a devoted member of the pack. In an effort at levity, everyone in the family slips Spottie a chunk of the birthday cake and a good time is had by all… and scene. There is no disclaimer running across the bottom of the screen warning against feeding your dog chocolate. Especially dark chocolate. Not in cake, candy bars, pudding, ice cream, Hershey’s kisses. While your puppy may not drop dead after ingesting a very minuscule amount of chocolate, it definitely will cause illness and could, in a big enough amount, cause death.

     Many of us know about chocolate and dogs. We might be aware of the warnings pertaining to grapes, nuts, onions, garlic, chewing gum and avocados. Did you know there are many, many more foods, drinks and medications that are dangerous to your best friend? Beer, chives, coffee, milk, mushrooms, raisins and tomatoes are definite no no’s. There are lists online of the foods AND medications you can not give your BPF (Best Pet Friend). In my estimation, it is imperative to educate yourself about these foods and medications when you give a pet a new forever home.  I’m glad I knew how bad sugar-free foods are for pets. I have the unfortunate habit of getting rid of used sugar-free gum by wrapping it in the original foil wrapper to throw it away. My baby puppy got hold of one of those foil wrapped balls and chewed on it for probably a second before I realized what she was doing. I freaked out! Aspartame is poisonous for dogs. I called the vet who assured me there wasn’t any danger because it was ABC (already been chewed) gum so most of the aspartame was probably gone and the foil wrapper probably kept her from chewing too much because the foil wouldn’t feel good on her teeth. Whew!

     Take a look around you. We have an obese society. I’m convinced some of this obesity is caused by all the fast food we eat. I also think other medical issues on the rise like infertility, attention deficit issues, increased gastrointestinal problems may be a result of GMOs and other modified ways of producing the foods we eat. Yet we don’t think twice about giving a fast food burger and fries to our BPF. Why would we stop when commercials, T.V. shows and movies show these wonderful creatures eating (and craving) all the foods we eat and crave? I love my dog as much as the next guy so when we have pizza or burgers and fries, and she begs, I’m tempted to give in under the umbrella of not being cruel and heartless. But I don’t though, no matter how cute my baby is giving me the “I’m a good girl” look. Sometimes you have to be unfair to be a loving pet parent.

     I wish I could convince the irresponsible writers of T.V. shows, movies, cartoons, and commercials to stop implying dogs, cats, hamsters, gerbils, birds, et. al. can eat anything and everything we do with no consequences. I’d like to be rid of this particular button forever. However until that happens, educate yourself about what is good for your BPF and what isn’t. Don’t be suckered into believing your furry/feathery/scale-y friends can eat whatever you do just because you see it on T.V. or in the movies or on a commercial. Your best friend will thank you and so will I.

     Thanksgiving is just down the road. Seems like it was only last month we were getting ready for 4th of July. The days just seem to fly by. In Colorado, we had summer, then a cold, sprinkling of  winter “flurries”, then summer again for a couple of weeks, fall for about 12 1/2 hours and now we’re into the “winter season”. One day the leaves were still on the trees and starting to turn, the next day they were scattered across any surface where they could gather. Autumn has always been my favorite time of the year and I’m sad for the shortened season this year.

     You would think Thanksgiving would be my favorite holiday since it comes in the fall but it’s not. It has become, at least to me, more about the food and where to eat that food. The gratitude aspect seems to have become merely an after-thought. Talk show hosts, comedians, sit-coms and books regale us with stories of all the animosity surrounding the dinner table; political debates, old slights or disappointments, guilt, recriminations and accusations. It makes for great plot twists, either humorous or, in the extreme, murderous. But I don’t believe that’s normal in most of our homes.

     What the holiday is is a lot of work. The cleaning, the planning and shopping then the cooking take a lot of time. We spend hours preparing and thirty minutes devouring. We groan, unbutton or unzip and watch football. If we have the energy, we go for a walk or engage in a friendly game of football with family and friends. In the past several years, we gobble down the meal then rush to the mall for those early Black Friday Christmas sales. Yay! Isn’t it great the retailers can’t give their employees the day off to spend with their families instead opting to open Thanksgiving afternoon in hopes of ca$hing in?

     You can eat turkey year round now. I remember looking forward to turkey day because Thanksgiving and Christmas were about the only time that particular bird could be found. (I always tried to steal strips of the crispy turkey skin while my father carved up the bird. There is nothing better than warm, crispy roasted turkey skin. Chicken skin is not the same.) You can find cranberry jelly year ‘round. There are always boxes of stuffing in various flavors plus jars of turkey gravy. The lack of availability certainly added to the enjoyment of the meal.

     My mother gathered relatives and friends for Thanksgiving who might otherwise not have anyplace else to go. In later years, there were the widows and widowers of  old friends who would otherwise have been alone. I remember a time when some dear, long-time friends who were suppose to go out of town wound up eating with us due to inclement weather. It was a last minute invitation but posed no problem to just pull another couple of chairs up to the table. Though it was a rite of passage to graduate from the kid’s table to the adult table, it was never an issue for the “younger” adults to make the move back to the kids table. Don’t tell anyone I admitted this but the kid’s table was more fun. 😉

     One Thanksgiving, over forty years ago, will live in my memory forever. My parents and I were invited to Mitchell, Nebraska to my mother’s cousin Dorothy’s. I don’t know how to begin to describe Dorothy. She was extraordinary in every way. She taught music, had choral groups she took to competitions all around the world while in her 60s and was a bright, sparkling light to all who knew her. I had no idea what I was in for and even if I had known, could never have imagined how wonderful it would be.

     Dorothy lived in a modest-sized house. The only reason I remark on the size of her home is because she always invited lots of people. The tables were beautifully set with candles and lovely centerpieces. Dorothy, like my mother, collected strays along with her relatives; people who would otherwise be alone. She encouraged lively conversation and an atmosphere of joy.

     Then there was the food, glorious food. It was an embarrassment of riches although the last thing I felt was embarrassment. Maybe a fear of over-eating but I’m not sure you could have avoided it. There was the requisite turkey and all the trimmings, ham, corn, sweet potatoes, scalloped potatoes, standing rib roast beef, pickles, olives and cheeses, bread and rolls and desserts: pumpkin pies, fruit pies, cakes and cookies. The food was amazing, the company was incredible, the hostess and host were gracious and generous. Dorothy’s students unselfishly helped out by busing the tables during dinner, refilling glasses and coffee cups throughout the evening then helping to clean up when the last guest left. I had never experienced anything like that before and, other than going to a Thanksgiving buffet at a very upscale restaurant several years ago, nothing like it since. It was a once in a lifetime occasion that I will never forget. I’m sure Dorothy had help preparing all the food, at least I certainly hope she did. At the end of the evening you felt loved and grateful to be included.

     Now, for me, Thanksgiving feels like the starting gun for the Christmas shopping season. I miss sitting around the dinner table reminiscing and catching up. I miss dressing up for dinner. Some people have several “dinners” to try to get to so no one feels left out. I’m grateful for my husband, family and puppy. That I have a home to live in, enough food to eat and health. I wish for better days in 2019. Less anger and animosity, more kindness and consideration. I hope we all will try to treat everyone with the respect they deserve, even if or especially if, you don’t agree with them. So as you are seated around your Thanksgiving table, take time to feel grateful and encourage an atmosphere of joy.

     I have to admit I’m jealous of my husband’s knitting skills. He can knit a fair isle pattern that is amazing! I made myself a couple of sweaters, a cardigan and some hats. I even started knitting my husband a sweater but then he finished something he was working on, I got intimidated and stopped halfway through his sweater. (Believe me, my mother’s voice admonishing me for not finishing what I’d started played in my head for weeks.) Don’t misunderstand, I am very proud that he knits and crochets and doesn’t feel it’s unmanly. He enjoys it, is self-taught for the most part and has made some amazing things from hats and gloves to Amigurumi stuffed toys. It’s a wonderful creative outlet for him and I love that he does it. I just wish I could.

     As you might imagine (or have experienced), it bothered me that I couldn’t knit as well. Then I realized, “Hey, I have skills”. When I was much younger, I made most of my clothes. I made dresses, skirts and jackets. I even made a kilt once. Being able to sew saved my life when I started to work in an office and needed professional outfits to wear. Plus, it let me use the money I saved to buy Shoes❣️

     There’s a lot to be gained being “crafty”. I’ve started sorting out and throwing away some of the Christmas decorations we’ve accumulated over the past twenty-five years. Believe me, there’s way too much “stuff” to be called sane. It’s not quite hoarding status yet but it’s getting close. For many years there wasn’t a Santa, snowman or reindeer decoration I could pass up. I’ve made Christmas wreaths, ornaments, stockings and wall-hangings. Decorations for outdoors, decorations for indoors. Every year I decorate the front window like it’s Barney’s in New York City, replete with lights, snowmen, snow and anything else that is festive.

     I find when I’m working on a project, I sort of go into a meditative state. Crafting relaxes me. There have been times when my projects didn’t turn out like I thought they would. Some only appeal to me for one season so instead of packing them away in yet another box, I’m actually tossing them out. There is so much satisfaction to be had in working on something and seeing it through to completion. I take pride in using the decorations I make during the holidays. I love the work involved designing a layout for the garden, researching what plants to use, imagining how they will look as the garden matures. It boosts my self-esteem to learn new cooking skills, to try new recipes then plan the perfect dinner for my husband and me.

     I think we all need a creative outlet for our general well-being. I always try to do at least one project when the holidays start. I like to give friends and family something homemade. One year I made loaves of eggnog bread, another time I made caramel popcorn from scratch. I love getting homemade things so much more than something from a department store. To me, it feels more personal and special. I’m afraid many of the skills I learned growing up; sewing, cross-stitch, embroidery, knitting and crocheting, are becoming a lost art. People today are so busy they don’t have time to learn a craft. It’s sad because there’s a lot of satisfaction and joy in making something wonderful. I’m learning to make shower melts with essential oils right now. I don’t have it mastered yet but even the failures smell great and make for some lovely morning showers. Guess you never are too old to learn something new. At least the shower bombs will melt away and I won’t have to worry about throwing the rejects away😉.